- You know how when you're at a restaurant, and they give you bread or rolls and butter,
and the butter comes in those little cube packages? And you try to spread the butter on the bread and it just rips the bread to pieces? You know what I'm talking about. That butter that restaurants give you that is totally unspreadable. Well, here's my question: Who the hell makes that butter and why do restaurants keep giving it to me? Knock it off, you know better.- I can't think of many situations more awkward then going to a sit-down restaurant and requesting a "table for one".
- You know how if your name or picture are in the newspaper or something, you cut it out and keep it (or at least your mom does)? Well, at what point does that end if you're a celebrity? If you're Britney Spears, do you own every magazine that you've been on the cover of? Does Jon Gosselin's mom have a box in the attic full of tabloids that feature him? That would seem weird, no?
- Who was the first person to create a fake plant? My mom always has fake tulips in the kitchen, and even next to me right now is a big....just...plant. It's not really a bush, and it's certainly not a tree or flower, it's just a mass of leaves, kind of. Who started this? Who's brilliant idea was it to create a plastic plant to put in living rooms and libraries, etc.?
1 comment:
for number one, my friend blogged about that very topic. how long do you wait to say hello? i always hate when you know you saw each other, you still pretend to be interested in the tree you've seen a hundred times before, and then you look up and you missed them, and feel like a douche.
for number two, i know the answer to that. it's not that the butter company sucks, although they might. it's because they pull it straight out of the refrigerator. Butter spreads way better at room temperature.
for number three, i just got back from sitting by myself at a dining hall, so... no comment. although i embraced my inner geek and ate my chick-fil-a nuggets with chopsticks, as i usually do. a lot of people looked confused. i'd say more but i should probably blog about that.
for number four, ugh, matt, wrong "you're". should be "your". i'm crying now.
i don't have a comment on number five, but i do have real plants. i bought what i thought was a cactus at trader joes, cause that's awesome, but then got home and was informed that it was aloe vera, which is wussy. i do not understand basic plant differentiation. nor do i know why i comment with more words than people use to blog. good post as usual.
Post a Comment